What to do when you’re unclear, confused and don’t know what to do.
“Don’t worry when you are not recognized, but strive to be worthy of recognition.” — Abraham Lincoln
We all have moments of clarity amidst spells of confusion.
Like when lighting flashes across a dark and stormy plain, you’ve got only a brief moment to take in the full picture and burn it into your mind – or you’ll soon be groping around the dark again.
If your business is growing, you need to make frequent decisions that will affect its nature and direction.
And if your business isn’t growing as you hoped, the confusion is all the more oppressive.
How to catch that lightning bolt and make it stay.
It’s amazing when you think about it: Most people don’t know what they really want out of life. And so they go this way and that. Their scattered and random actions don’t add up.
A smaller number do know what they want to HAVE in life. Sometimes – not always – this tells them what to DO. Which is a pretty good place to be.
You’ll achieve more knowing what you want to have, but it’s not enough. It comes and goes. And it’s often accompanied by moments of severe doubt. You question whether this or that is really what you want.
And it’s not unusual that success comes hand-in-hand with that empty feeling of “OK, here I am. Now what?”
There’s another approach that gives you constant clarity.
The other approach begins with who you want to BE. Who do you really, really want to BE?
If you’re unclear, confused and you don’t know what to do, look again at the kind of person you want to BE.
Do you want to be someone who feels pulled this way and that by the people in your life, or do you want to be someone who can set clear priorities and has the discipline to follow through?
Be that way today. Do what such a person would do in the situation you are in.
How do you want to behave in the face of great uncertainty? Do you want to be thrown off kilter, or do you want to go into your deep reserves of confidence and take it one day at a time?
Be that way today. Do what such a person would do.
Do you want to be frantically trying to keep a table full of plates spinning, or do you want to be pursuing excellence in a focused slice of life?
Be that way today.
Do you want to be another spectator alongside the parade, or do you want to be boy who isn’t afraid to say “The emperor has no clothes!”
Be that way today.
Do you want to be worried that there won’t be enough, or do you want to be someone who feels and exudes the confidence that there’s more than enough.
Be that way today.
Do you want to be someone who moves his business this way and that to satisfy your varied interests, curiosity and talents – and to avoid decisions – or do you want to be someone who makes difficult choices and then uses his interests, curiosity and talents to place one brick upon the next until your castle is built?
When you have a clear picture of who you want to BE, you’re never at a lost for what to DO.
You can BE what you want right now, even if it takes some time to HAVE what you want.
Your Next Action Step:
Get a pen and paper, get away from distractions and and answer this one question:
Who do you want to be?
For now, write out five or six qualities you most want to own. Get that image of how you want to BE crystal clear and you’ll never be at a loss of what to do. The more you act like that person, the more you’ll BE him. And it’ll just be a matter of time before you have what he has.
And that’s really what you want, isn’t it?
Once again, you’ve broken down a complicated issue into simplicity. Thank you!
Thank you for the words of inspiration to a much needed soul of guidance and your right life largest problems can be solved within our selves.
Aaah – another post idea is born. Stimulating stuff
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Simple business elegance! Right on track! Thanks
How much more powerful to ask ‘Who do I want to be’?! Great empowering insight. Let’s see what happens now as a result of this one new empowering question.
Thank you all for your comments and retweets. It’s nice to get some audience reactions.
Dov
Thanks Dov! I also think there’s another part that sits on top of “who you want to be” that’s extremely important. I believe it’s “how can I help others through who I want to be?” or “what value can I provide?”
If you don’t have that down, you’ll probably be better off as an academic rather than a businessperson.
Chris
Sorry I realise that your article didn’t mention anything about business & academia – I guess what I was trying to say is that being customer-driven is critical in running a business. And it’d be better if you were intrinsically motivated to serve your customers… which comes by thinking deeply about the questions mentioned.
Chris
Hi Chris,
These two ideas are not mutually exclusive. You can care a lot about your customers and still have moments – or longer – where you loose your clarity and direction.
Thanks for your comment,
Dov
i tried the exercise, chose 5 qualities… i will let u all know if when-if i reach my qualities.
thank u Dov for your essays
estee
Hi Estee,
The great thing about this is that it’s not about “reaching” or “achieving” these qualities.
Let’s say you wanted to be more confident. How would you act in the next 10 minutes if you were more confident? What would you do or not do?
Then just be that way. When you approach life this way, you’re experiencing a continuous series of small successes. It’s about the journey anyway, right?
Thanks for stopping by and sharing with us,
Dov
I have Post Traumatic Shock Syndrome from a nasty divorce that turned criminal. You give clarity in a time of confusion. The ability to see and stay focus is difficult. Your words of wisdom bring clarity and encouragement to see the bigger picture and stay focused. God has truly answered my pray from the western wall in directing you to me in the first place. Keep up the good work. You not only help the business person to see clarity but the every day person who are having heavy issues in their life. You are truly a LIFE COACH – Thank God.
and now it is about practising this on a day to day basis and become “pro”. To get on autopilot with this thinking.
[...] say it’s time to be unreasonable. It’s an entrepreneurial necessity. Be the person you WANT to be, but “can’t” be for whatever [...]