Help me please – Where do you get stuck when talking about what you do?
Do people get excited when you tell them what you do?
Do you express yourself with clear confidence? Or do you feel at a loss for words that express with elegance and finality why you’re different. And how someone’s business and life will change when they hire you.
You’re probably very eloquent when you’re doing your work. But when you need to sell yourself, you may find yourselves tongue tied and ineffective.
If that’s true for you, please help me out!
At the end of April I’ll be in New York to run a workshop. I already have my plane ticket. Now I need a topic.
Broadly speaking, the workshop will help you easily talk about what you do in a way that draws your ideal clients to you.
BUT… There are any number of ways I can approach this topic. Help me decide the best way for you. (Whether you expect to join me in New York or not.)
Please answer two questions in the comments section below:
1. When it comes to talking about what you do in a compelling way, where do you get stuck?
2. What is the impact of getting stuck? How does it hold you back?
As a thank you – anyone who provides a real response will be invited to some kind of closed-door teleseminar training on the topic as things come together.
Thank you,
Dov Gordon
1) Get stuck when trying to explain why they have to pay up front fees for a service that they perceive others as providing on a contingency basis.
2) The impact is major. If I can’t get them to see the added value in what I do, they won’t bite. Seems maany of them have been burned in the past – so differentiation is criticial and not always clear.
Thank you Chuck.
Dov
1. I have no problem talking about my product (book) but I do stall myself out when I’m trying to communicate why groups (churches mostly) should buy the product in bulk. Somehow my clear, concise pitch for the book gets turned into a ramble, and I work against myself.
2. The impact of this is directly tied to sales, which is directly tied to future projects/products. I wrote this book as a launching point, and I’d I can’t lock down bulk orders, the book will take much longer to sell, which means my next project can’t begin and/or doesn’t get much attention.
Thank you, Chuck.
Do you get the response you want when talking to people about buying one copy? If yes, what do you feel might be the difference?
Dov
Typically, I get the response I want talking about one copy. I think the difference is that I feel I have to sell more when I’m talking $1,000 or $2,5000, rather than $25.
Very similar to Chuck K. After over 25 years in a totally different industry, I started a new career as a real estate agent last year. I find it difficult asking potential clients for payment of my full fee when there are so many agents advertising no fee listings in places like Craigs List.
The result of this is either a lost client or reduced fee resulting in a lot less income.
Where I get stuck is making my excitement relevant to my listeners. They understand I have passion, and that I love my work, but making that something for my audience to care about is difficult. Which means if I’m not showing them the benefits- they could care less about my artwork. Unfortunately.
Hi Kaelin,
May I respectfully suggest that it’s not about you making the benefits clear to them. There’s a step before that: you need to deeply understand why your ideal client buys art when he does.
Only after they feel you understand them will they be open to your influence.
Thanks for your comment,
Dov
Hi Dov,
I had to go away and think about your comment. When I read it, my initial response was- “But I know my customers and they buy art because….” And then I was stuck, because my answer seemed too simple, and only applied to half of my customers. “Because they think it’s beautiful, and want to own that sense of beauty” only applies to this group and is easily swayed by factors such as price, and perceived value.
The other portion of my customers are the husbands of the first group. They certainly don’t purchase my work out of a sense of beauty, but rather to make their wives happy. They don’t care so much about price or perceived value, but it may be a contributing factor.
So in reality, neither group would be moved by my excitement or my passion. Instead, I should be focusing on how to reassure them on price and showcase the value given.
All of which I only realized after your respectful suggestion.
Thank you.
Kaelin
Hi Kaelin,
Glad to hear that.
You’re on the right road now, but you need to dig a bit deeper.
You don’t need to reassure them on price. You do need to showcase the value given. But you need to articulate that value more specifically.
If a husband is buying it for his wife, you need to understand WHY he is buying it for her.
When you worry about price, you’re not thinking about HIM. You’re thinking about yourself. You need to really get to the bottom of why a husband buys your jewelry for his wife. There are different aspects here:
1. Why he’s buying her something at all.
2. Why is he buying her jewelry.
3. Why is he drawn to your jewelry. (Or is that coming from her?)
As for her:
“Want to own that sense of beauty” is not quite there yet. How does she feel about herself when she wears your jewelry? (How does she feel when she receives it as a gift from her husband? And how does that make him feel?)
Is this getting clearer for you?
Dov
This happens when I talk to people about why they need a website and what they need to look for.
I don’t know if I’m starting at stage 3 or 4 or using vocabulary they aren’t used to or if they computerphobes or what – but suddenly I can see that lost look in their eyes and then I know I’ve lost them. So I start backtracking to where I THINK I lost them, than just before that . . . and the whole situation is just gone.
What gets me is that a couple of times not long after, I’ve run into them again – and they have actually bought a website. Usually a terrible one, but they are thrilled.
Really weird, frustrating, and really really weird.
If this is a pattern, you probably need to ask more questions before you talk about what you do. Make sure you walk them through Level 3 before you make your recommendation – Level 4.
If you think you lost someone, instead of assuming you know where they are ask: “I seem to have lost you. Where did I lose you?”. That’s one way.
Thanks for your comment,
Dov
You’re right Dov, I need to listen more rather than go on and on about what I really love. And I need to be more aware the the facial clues and body language. That would help too.
My biggest hurdle is perception, which forces the price question to the front. For many people, tax prep, bookkeeping, and accounting in general are just so much ink-on-paper, and too boring to contemplate. In the current economy, more and more people are hanging up their shingle and advertising to do the same work for pennies on the dollar. In short, folks ask for costs up front, even before telling me what they do or need. The bottom line is, you might be able to call up the grocery store and ask for the price of a can of beans, x-size can, Y-manufacturer, but you can’t ask for a price on a “bag of groceries.” Trying to explain this to people is very difficult, and yet they want to have this conversation first. I need to constantly remind myself that the folks who shop in the bargain basement are not my clients, and to just smile and walk away. When I don’t, I get sucked in to their way of thinking and risk compromising my rates. But, hey! Just writing this out was a great exercise, and should help me be stronger. Thank you!
Hi BA,
I’ll send you a bill!
Thanks for your comment,
Dov
Web site designers have a similar problem…always asked “What does a web site cost?” I used to tell them it’s like asking “What does a car cost?” Depends on what you require of it…I finally realized a lot of clients don’t know enough about what they could have in a web site let alone a bag of groceries, so I finally talked about 3 categories of sites with corresponding budgets, and described the types of businesses/goals that fit each…also asked how they valued their time and getting something done right and quickly the first time vs going the DIY trial and error route that costs a lot less in dollars but much more in time and re-dos/frustration. That helped. I hope you don’t care I chimed in here, Dov…couldn’t help sharing cause I could relate! (Did you even know I was a graphic/web designer for eons before I was a photographer?)
I’m very glad that you chimed in. Anyone who has an experience or perspective that can help others is welcome to comment any time.
Yes, I knew you were a graphic designer. You told me.
Dov
My issue is more about finding people to tell them what I do. Since I work with business owners (and others) with back pain and the stress that accompanies the pain, I know that my services are needed. But where do I go to tell people about how I can help them feel better faster?
I just don’t seem able to identify my specialism even to myself very clearly, so tend to default to the things I’ve been hired for that I enjoyed most. Trouble is, I know I haven’t got it quite right, as I can’t express even those with any great passion. By the time I get past “I can make your business information reporting slick and meaningful”, I’ve already lost them! Yet I ought be able to interest FDs in this, as I’ve lost count of the pathetic reporting regimes I’ve encountered that have lost all management credibility.
Hi Stephanie,
You need to uncover the problem(s) they have and don’t want – and the results they want and don’t have, that you can solve.
It must be problems they already perceive that they have. The most frustrating sales situation is to be trying to convince someone that they have a problem when they think all is well. Fortunately, you don’t need to be doing that.
Thank you for your comment,
Dov
It can be difficult sometimes to figure out what’s potentially compelling in the eyes of the prospect.
The impact is that I revert to vanilla blandness.
Hi Brendan,
“Vanilla blandness.”
Thanks for your comment,
Dov
I certainly have no problem telling people about my passion for photography, but my problem comes in convincing them theat me, a beginer, am their best choice over all the other AMAZING photogs out there. And a lot of people want price right away, I start to loose confidance right then, and have a hard time diverting them from that ? right off the jump, or soon into our convo because even though I know that a lot of people love my work, I find it hard to prove myself worthy.
So at that point, I usually loose the opportunity to work with someone because they are not convinced, or truely looking to me to fill that void, and we struggle because we are not making enough money to make ends meet.
Hi Robyn,
The good news is that no one other than you really cares if you are just getting started.
You need to separate your confidence in your photography from your concern about how to sell it to others. There should be an iron curtain in between them.
You don’t need to prove yourself worthy. You need to determine who you’d most like to work with and why. And you need to be understand what people are really buying when they hire a photographer.
Give yourself a few weeks break where you completely stop trying to sell. And ONLY look to learn and understand what your ideal clients really, really want.
Thanks for your comment,
Dov
1. I am very persuasive until they ask how much something costs and then as soon as money comes into the picture I am tongue tied or blustery..
2. Also I find it difficult to promote my art as it is like boasting and I was brought up not to boast… an artist has to promote themselves so this is a huge barrier to success on the scale I want.
That selling gap, between who we are and what we are offering really needs to be minimized, I mean extinguished. Completely.
So Dov, I would like to propose that you put an end to that gap at your workshop. A live workshop is best used when the material is venue targeted. Take advantage of the audiences pulse and close that gap.
The one thing we all have in common is we are all different. Our differences hold our commonality, and in that space lurks our selling gap.
Transverse at your workshop Dov.
1- I run a non-profit camp for senior adults – I am passionate about our programs and how if you come to our camp you will gain in many ways – I get stuck when making my presentations when i realize that i am talking about something so outside their threshold of experience – “why should i go to your camp for a vacation” I find it very hard to get them to understand the benefits of a vacation with us far out weighs the costs ( which are very low)
2- When i get stuck I begin to lose my own passion and belief in our product and see it through their eyes and then feel foolish for even thinking they may be interested.
Hi Susan,
See my comment to Stephanie above. You need to uncover what they already want. And then show them how they will get it at your camp.
Trying to convince them that they should want what you think they should want is the most ineffective and frustrating way to sell anything.
Thank you for your comment,
Dov
1) Scope, and Context. Rambling is no good, at the same time different situations require different information/content. I need to focus in on what’s relevant in a given situation. Sometimes this is a higher level perspective. (Details are ‘captured’ but left out.)
2) Lost opportunity
Needed: Clarity. The clearer I am the more focused/appropriate I can be…
“Clear thinking is your highest paid work.”
- The Alchemist Entrepreneur
Thanks for your comment, Ken.
Dov
1.I do so many things I don’t know where to start when asked about what I do. I am able to answer that I have a business and explain what I do but I feel like I dont have that first sentence to draw people in..
2.It makes me feel inadequate, almost embarrassed by what I do, and this is not the image I wish to portray.
Hi Aviva,
You may do many things. But your ideal client only buys one thing at any given time.
My sense is that you need to make some choices – for marketing purposes.
Thanks for your comment.
Dov
As a rule, I am quite excited about my project and I am able to convey that excitement to others. Unfortunately if I have had a particularly discouraging day, I am unable to mask how I feel. I have found that this is a time for me to quietly regroup, and not a time for me to interact with others. If I’m not in my top form, I’m likely to shoot myself in the foot.
I already answered above…
I’m finding this video helpful:
http://www.ted.com/talks/lang/en/simon_sinek_how_great_leaders_inspire_action.html
1. I am very internal, and I can see something, feel it, and know it, but it oftentimes seems awfully hard for me to express it in words. And I feel like I’m always in entrepreneur-mode, working on my business and improving it, so when it comes time when a potential client asks about a specific service, I tend to get get stuck. Like that info is stored in a separate part of my brain and it’s hard for me to get to it. As I write this, I’m wondering if I should write down the services I offer, info about them, and emotional blurbs that would capture their attention and hopefully lead them to action. And then review that info a couple times a week, every week so it stays fresh in my mind. Maybe this would help? I can’t figure out where there’s such a disconnect in my brain.
2. Gosh, it kills any kind of a sale from people I meet in person. In not being able to describe what I do and what I could offer them, I seem very incompetent.
Hi Kristen,
I definitely relate to your post! I like your idea of preparing and reviewing answers in advance. Thank you.
Hi Dov,
Where do I get stuck? Let me count the ways: I am afraid of specific questions related to experience specific to my niche. It’s the thought that I don’t have enough battle stories, proven results or laurels to back up what I am saying.
I also want to keep things related to experience and results more generalized as not to impact on client privacy. B/c of privacy issues I would rather be quiet than risk saying the wrong thing.
There is the “when are they going to discover I am a big talker-but actually can not guarantee what they will take away from our work together ” voice. I can’t say “use this cream and you’ll look ten years younger in two weeks” b/c that’s not the kind of thing I am selling. The success of my work is largely dependent on what my client does with it.
As I coach a topic that cuts close to home (comfortable communication with teenage and adult children)there’s the “what if they think I messed up with my own kids” aka: who am I to talk?
In general, I am not comfortable “tooting my own horn” -so to toot it and then ask for money on top of it?
Oh, and I hate the “So, how’s business?” question. “How many clients do you have?” b/c I am not yet happy with the answers to those questions-so I would rather not bring up the the subject of what I do at all.
Impact: If I don’t believe in myself-that feeling is broadcasted whether I like it or not. Those thoughts cause me to shrink up and hold back. I create a vicious circle of not feeling confident-not talking about what I do-not getting more clients-not having the opportunity to build confidence –which leads back to not feeling confident.
So here goes: I coach parents whose teenage and young adult children have made decisions that make them, the parents, cringe. and I am darn good at it!
A few things that get me stuck:
1) still trying to pinpoint what exactly we offer/can offer that will target a specific ideal client
2) I’m used to the generic “website promotion/internet marketing” term which I’ve been saying for the past few years and am still uncomfortable (for no really good reason) with using a longer “I help people…” statement when asked “what do you do?”
3) I get tense that’s I’m not going to do a good job presenting myself
Impact: people say “okay” and that’s the end of that. I actually did try a longer “I help people” type statement recently, and the person said, “Oh, we should talk; I have a website and need…” She doesn’t really have money to spend, so she’s not ideal in that way, but it was encouraging.
Here’s where I get so frustrated… I hear, “Oh, we should talk…” to which I say, “when would you like to do that?” and they answer…”oh, I don’t know…maybe next week…pretty busy…call me!” which I do and it starts a voice mail and email avoidance sequence (what it feels like) that I no longer have any patience for. I’m in one of those situations right now after a prospect called me to initiate a very cool year-long photo project of their very beautiful farm. We met, I put our conversation in a letter agreement for their signature, they’ve told me on the phone and to my face (when I saw them in the store) they want to do it, but I can’t get that agreement signed to save my life, yet they say they have no concerns…we should just get together and do some planning and they’ll call me. They say they want to get started now, not later, when I ask about their timing…I don’t want to become a pest so another week will go by before I try to call again. Is there something I’m not asking/seeing?
Oh, and the impact of this “stuck” place is I lose patience, confidence, and even desire to do the job, even tho it’s the coolest job, potentially…I feel it requires more hand-holding than I am good at…and I don’t know where the line is between helpful hand-holding and becoming a pest.
Her: “Oh, we should talk..”
Me: “Why?”
—
From this distance, it’s hard to know what the issue is in the particular situation you describe, but if it’s a pattern, then it’s probably something stemming from you.
Look for ways to have them put some skin in the game very early on and at every stage in your process. It can be a small fee. It can be simply requiring them to do something your way.
When people are not willing, it’s an early clue that they’re not as committed as they claim to be.
Dov
Thanks, Dov. There must be a perfect question that reveals objections without coming off as pushy or assumptive as to what it might be, when a prospect SAYS they want to move forward asap, yet can’t seem to prioritize hitting the ball that’s been dropped squarely in their court to put minimal skin in the game.
“You say X. Yet your behavior is A and B which seems to indicate Y. How should I understand it?”
Hi Dov,
Great question.
I get stuck when talking and writing about what I do when I balance trying to be clear with differentiating myself.
It’s not hard to say that my company works in online marketing and web design. But, when I translate that to how I’m different it is very easy to come off as a typical hyperbolic marketer or sales person.
Good luck with your seminar
~ julian
Hi Julian,
Are you clear about who your ideal client is? What’s the single biggest problem you help solve?
Dov